Dangerous men come in all shapes and forms, slipping into our lives by appearing, at least in the beginning incredibly "normal". There are no neon flashing signs, no sirens and one-size-fits-all does not pertain as to how they look or act. A man's career, eye color or face shape has no barrier as to what lies deep inside. The majority of the time they blend into society, looking like any other man we might consider dating or even be married to. What does this mean? The detection is entirely up to you. Often though too many females have experiences that begin with "I didn't know he was like that. I didn't recognize the warning signs. I believed "his" story."
We know that women are battered, stalked, raped, abused and killed every day in this country, mostly by dangerous men. We know that each day domestic violence shelters take women in to shield them from dangerous men and from behaviors that the women did not recognize at the time as dangerous. In every town across America, women are being counseled or assisted because of dangerous men - and not just men who are violent. "Dangerousness" comes in many types of packages.
But let us think about something. Don't you think that we are missing something if millions of women continue to end up with men who could be classified as dangerous? There must be something in many women's personal detection system that is "offtrack". This detection system seems to only exist for other women as so often it is asked, "Doesn't she know he beats women?". "Doesn't she know that he has a drinking problem or criminal history?" We seem to all ears, eyes and radar up when another woman's life is at stake. But what about when it comes to your own life? Our radar falls short. We claim to know the reality about what happens between dangerous men and the women who get involved with them, but still we date or marry dangerous men.
Dangerous men have lived among us always and they always will. It's not realistic to imagine waiting for a "dating and marriage utopia", not all choices will be safe. Therefore, it is up to us to learn what we can do and how we can keep ourselves safe. It is up to us to know the signs of dangerous men and be sure to heed to those signs. Understanding what dangerous men look and act like is a life skill that just may keep these men out or get them out of our lives. You cannot avoid what you do not see. It's imperative to allow someone to help you see and then to help or assist you to choose differently.
Take care and STAY SAFE!Anny Jacoby
A Success Survivor
"Raising female awareness and skills to reduce susceptibility in response to violence."
If you are in an abusive relationship, you need a plan.
Moving Out, Moving On; authored by Susan Murphy-Milano will guide you through the necessary steps of ending a relationship safely.
You can purchase your copy HERE.
Moving Out, Moving On; authored by Susan Murphy-Milano will guide you through the necessary steps of ending a relationship safely.
You can purchase your copy HERE.
For scheduling training, appearances or speaking engagements for Anny, please contact ImaginePublicity.
contact@ImaginePublicity.com
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I just found your site today off of Stop The Roller Coaster, I'm Getting Off. I'm going to take it all in. I married 2 dangerous men, and believe my father was a dangerous man. In all 3 instances, none of them were physically abusive, but the verbal, emotional, and psychological aspects were all there. When I left my 2nd husband, I was a walking zombie. I continued to see him on and off, even after the divorce, and could not seem to stop. I believe part of it was out of fear, and my low self esteem. I finally read Gift Of Fear, and that helped me. I have been no contact now for awhile, but the fear is always there a little bit in some way. I have grown much stronger, and want to continue on that path. At 50 years old, I am at peace with a peaceful home, and for the first time in my life not under someone's control. I don't ever want to find myself in that situation again. Thanks for listening. I remain anon. because of the fear.
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