Rothbard posed as a 17-year-old (actual age 28) on MySpace and used text messages to arrange "a meeting" with his alleged 15-year-old female victim. A police officer during a routine patrol discovered them having sex in a parked car at Westbrook Elementary School in West Islip.
Rothbard is now considered a sexual predator which describes a person seen as obtaining or trying to obtain sexual contact with another person in a predatory manner. A predator hunts down its prey, so the sexual predator is thought to “hunt” for his or her sex partners. People who commit sex crimes, such as rape or child sexual abuse, are commonly referred to as sexual predators.
Due to the fact that I am a parent and advocate, I stand strong in my defense for our children. Understanding of the ripple effect on many individuals (the victim; the family, friends, colleagues and ultimately the predator's family, and same) involved in this crime committed by a sexual predator is imperative. Over time we will look at numerous effects, the ripple effects of sexual abuse.
Today, my first concern is for the child/children. Unfortunately, this young lady and her friends are the first nor will they be the last. Many organizations are fighting strongly for our children and I commend each. Keeping the topic in the forefront, being diligent in our crusade, being harmed with the right information will help to assist our children and families affected by this crime.
Your support of your children will make a huge difference to her/him, the victim who has been sexually assaulted. Begin by letting your child know that you want to listen. It doesn't matter so much as to what you say but how you listen. Find time to be alone with her. Let her talk without interrupting her. Show interest in what she says by sitting close and facing her. Listen intently, look at her to let her know that you are still with her and listening. Let the stalls and silences happen, it's okay. If she needs help to continue talking, try to repeat back to her the things that she said. BELIEVE HER - people rarely make up stories about a sexual assault or the events leading up to the crime. Let her know that you care. This may be the first time any family member has every encountered such an ordeal. Your expression of sympathy is comforting to her.
Reassure her that SHE IS NOT TO BLAME. Blaming questions are not helpful. Instead, "This is a difficult time and we, together will get through it - we are family."
Let her be in control of who knows about the details of the sexual assault. Keep whatever she says between you, the police and the attorney are to be just that. She may not want to go to school until things have settled down - we can't blame her, can we? She may be treated differently by others now. Again, it must be instilled in her that she did not do anything wrong - and that she is the victim.
A ripple effect will be felt by the victim's family - this is an upsetting event for everyone. Some victims reject those who can be most helpful in this time of crisis. You may become rejected as a parent or friend because you are a clear reminder of the assault that she is trying so desperately to forget. Give her the time and space that she needs, she will return. It's important for you to take care of yourself too. But don't ever give up on her. Read her emotions, body language, verbalization - continue to love her unconditionally and allow the healing process to take place. Everyone heals and transitions in their own and time.
I encourage everyone to seek help and guidance from qualified licensed individuals to work through this horrific event in her life. With love and knowing that you know that it wasn't her fault will help tremendously.
One of the many ripple effects.
Thank God for his unconditional love which gives us continual strength.
Take care and STAY SAFE!Anny Jacoby
A Success Survivor
The Realistic Female Self-Defense Company
"Raising female awareness and skills to reduce susceptibility in response to violence."
www.annyjacoby.com
www.realisticfemaleselfdefense.com
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